Why I Foster...Because Sometimes They Die

My foster kitten, Ash died yesterday.  My heart hurts.   I know some people don't understand my grief.  After all, I only knew Ash a week.

Some people might say "It was just a kitten.  There are plenty more where that one came from."   What they don't understand is that Ash's life mattered to me.  I'm proud to foster for an organization where Ash's life mattered to them too.  It would been easy for shelter staff to sleep through my phone calls and text messages at 1:00 in the morning, but they answered.  They could have told me there was nothing for me to do but instead they authorized me to take him to the emergency vet.  They did everything possible for Ash because his life mattered.  In the end there was nothing more they could do, but to humanely euthanize him. In that moment they were concerned for me because not only did Ash matter to them but I mattered too.

I'm sure I will hear "I don't know how you foster.  I could never do it."  Usually, I nod and politely say "I totally understand".  But sometimes I want to scream, "How can you not do it?  Somewhere out there is a kitten dying alone and unloved because you won't foster it!"  Logically, I know not everyone can foster and not everyone should foster.  But shelter's across the country are filled to the rafters with kittens and cats during the summer months.  They can only help more if they have foster families to support them.  Yes, there is a possibility that a kitten in your care could die.  They are fragile little beings.  Who knows what they could have been exposed to before they reach your care.  But more than likely they are going to grow up healthy and happy, ready to find their forever homes.

I foster because sometimes they do die.  It hurts but I wouldn't change a thing.  I know I've given them the best chance to survive but more importantly they were not alone and they were loved.  My heart hurts for Ash but my heart breaks even more for those who died alone and unloved.

All kittens matter...to me.

The One

If you are lucky in life, you will find "the one".   Someone with whom your heart and soul connects.  If you are very lucky, "the one" will be a cat.  If you are extremely lucky, you will find more than one "the one".

Captain was "the one" for me so it is with mixed feelings that I tell you he was adopted today.  And no, it was not by me.

Captain went home with a great family.  I was so happy I was able to meet them.  They are a younger couple with two dogs and another cat at home.  When I walked into the room to meet the couple, Captain was lying on the wife's lap like jello.  I knew immediately that Captain had found his "one".

Everyone is probably asking why didn't I just adopt Captain?  Unfortunately, timing isn't always right when you meet "the one".  Recently, I took a new job.  With that came working more hours.

I felt like I had to chose between keeping Captain or fostering more cats.  I knew Captain would find someone else who would love him as much as I do and I know I can make a difference in this world by fostering.

So tonight I'll cry both sad and happy tears.  Tomorrow, I'll start saving the world again one kitten at a time.

Jenny

Why I Foster

When I tell people I foster cats and kittens for an animal shelter, the first thing they usually say is "Oh, I could never foster.  I would never be able to give them up."   I will admit, sometimes it is hard.  I've cried more than once after returning a foster.

There are some things you can do to help with those feelings.

Cattitude

Start fostering with the correct attitude.  I go into it knowing that it is only temporary.  I constantly tell myself that if I keep one I'm am fostering then that is one less I can help in the future.  I only have limited time and resources.  I never want to have more cats than I can adequately care for.  You have to be realistic about your limits.

It's Not You.  It's Me.

Choose an animal to foster that you know you wouldn't want long term.  I love kittens.  I won't deny that but kittens grow into cats.  Then there is that awkward catten phase where kittens are essentially teenagers.  They have so much energy and so much to learn.  They are a lot of work and that's not something I want to do right now.

Put Your Positive Pants On

You have to trust the adoption process will find the purrfect family for your fosters.  I have to remind myself that I'm not the only one that can love these fur babies.  Shelters have adoption procedures in place for a reason.  I need to trust that my fosters will be going to a loving family that will offer them more than I can.

"'Tis better to have loved and lost than to have never have loved at all." - Alfred Lord Tennyson

The heartbreak I feel when returning my fosters doesn't even compare to all the joy that they bring into my life.  I love watching the kittens learn new things.  I love to see a shy kitten gain their confidence.  I love all the kitten cuddles and purrs.  I love the fact that not only am I helping the animals in my care, but I'm also creating space in the shelter so that they can help another animal.

If you've thought about fostering, I would recommend going for it.  Shelters all over the country are full and could use your help.  You can make a difference!